Tuesday, July 26, 2011

My Heart Today

My heart feels heavy.
Every time I get a minute to stop and just be quiet my mind is still racing. I see images of mothers, no different than me, holding their dying child in their arms. They have no food or clean water. They are forced to listen to their little ones hunger cries, and are completely helpless to do anything to help them. They watch as their child wastes away before their very eyes.  In Somalia, women are being forced to make the horrible choice of leaving behind their weaker children to save the stronger ones or having children die in their arms while they walk for days in hopes of finding food. Mothers and grandmothers are using rope to bind their stomachs to deaden hunger pangs so they can give what little food they have to their starving children. 
In this broken, fallen world there is so much pain and hurt, desperation and corruption, sadness and hunger. Children are dying, people are sick, young girls are being sold like merchandise, and boys are being trained as child soldiers , forced to kill their own families. In the US babies are being killed before they even take their first breath, families are falling apart, and people are enslaved to stuff. Millions of children are alone throughout the world. Children with no mommy or daddy to love them, to tuck them in at night, to play silly games with them, watch them take their first steps, teach them to ride a bike, give them a bath or teach them about Jesus. Millions of people are on a road to destruction, some never even hearing the gospel, some sincerely convinced they are "covered" because their good pile out weighs their bad and some shaking their fist in defiance till the end.

It's the easy route to say "there is too much, we can't do it all, so why even bother?". It is much more convenient to just change the channel, delete the email or turn a blind eye to the sadness and despair that plagues our world. 

This is what I did for too long. When I saw the pain, sadness, and wretchedness around me, I felt overwhelmed and uneasy. This would only last for a moment because when I felt like it became too much for me to handle I would choose to not think about it or let it really effect me. I would try to avoid feeling these emotions because I thought I had enough difficulties in my own life. I didn't have the time, energy, or emotional capacity to deal with other peoples hardships too.
But God. 
Now I finally see that feeling overwhelmed and emotionally spent is right where I am mean't to be. Crying (sometimes literally) out to God on behalf of the very least of these around the world. If I don't who will? This is where it starts, I believe this is the first step in making a difference. Stop fighting the spirit inside you that is crying out for the helpless. From here we need to be ready to act. Ready to give our time, money, resources. Ready to sacrifice our selfish wants and our comforts. The enemy wants us to believe the lies. To believe that one person could never make a difference in this messed up world. That it takes a "saint" or a "rich" person to make an impact and so we continue to live a quiet, self absorbed life in disobedience to the commands we were given. To take care of the poor, defend the hopeless, care for the orphan and widow and to spread the gospel to the ends of the earth. 
I want to love. give. sacrifice. go. pray. share. and encourage

1 comment:

  1. Wow. My heart is right there with you. You were one of the ones I was desperately praying for also. I'm so thankful for what God has been doing in your heart. Living like this together is what we were meant for, what our marriage was meant for. I love you and will continue to encourage you toward Jesus. Thank you for encouraging me.